My Family is Toxic......But I'm not!

By Raven

I hope you immediately found the headline, absurd. The title reflects how incongruous it is, next to the truth. Speaking from the perspective of an imperfect Christian; if your family is toxic, then that means you are either as toxic as they are, or you have serious unhealthy traits from your family, along with your own, that can transpire into greater problems, if you do not take the time to get rid of them.

I am just going to go off on a limb and say that, a majority of American families are toxic. Depending on one's frame of reference. The more we desire to be free and healthy, the greater our vantage point towards the truth becomes. I would like to add to the opening paragraph by stating; one stays toxic until they decide to break the chain and help themselves, in order to not repeat generational historical patterns.

Whatever you grew up with, is what you mold into or you acquire certain survival tactics that helps you to stay connected, even to those that you deem toxic. As human beings, we need connection and to belong to a tribe, a clan, a group, or a community. Until we are of age to choose who we would like to be and to be around, we "fake it till we make it." Which that euphemism alone, is a learnt toxic tool, that has become accepted by society that lacks joy in many capacities. Those survival tactics are not necessarily healthy, yet are accepted because they do not go against the grain.

These tactics also include:

*co-dependency

*going along with the group

*Not saying 'No'.

*Not calling out 'Wrong'.

*Being Neutral

*Not asking too many questions.

*Accepting everything at face value.

*Not willing to be uncomfortable.

ETC.

When examining anything toxic within a family, as a Christian, this is not just an issue of mental health and character, but more so, spiritual state. What the world identifies as "toxic", are really generational familiar spirits. Familiar spirits are demons. Any repetitive problem that spans from one generation to the next, is a familiar spirit. One cannot simply throw their hands up and walk away from that. It is in the blood line. The only salvation from that, is through the blood of Jesus. You can walk away, move away, go no contact with family, step into a new family hoping you will have the family you had always wanted, and it will mean nothing, if the familiar spirits in your life, that you were raised with, that latched on to you through bad associations, have not been overcome through salvation in Jesus' name, deliverance and restoration. I have not even made mention of generational curses that can only be broken in the name of Jesus. It does not matter what plans you make to get away, or how you feel. What matters are the actions that you take to eradicate decades even centuries of generational demons. Otherwise, you will be struggling with the same issues your Great great grandparent struggled with, or trying to break free from toxic struggles with no success. Those spirits will follow you and appear in different points of your life; relationships mainly, until you call on Jesus. The one whom can ultimately free you. It is like a stain that you cannot erase with your own fallible strength.

The first step is acknowledgement. There is so much talk about awareness, but awareness towards what? If you cannot take claim to the fact that along with family toxicity, that you are also toxic, until you are working on your healing and healed in those in depth areas, then you are aware of very little. Too many people like turning accountability into a mental health issue.....to avoid being accountable for their own faults. We have created a world full of "mental health junkies", that believes they are bold and brave grabbing hold of their depression, anxiety, stress......but we do not hear too much, how bold and brave it is, to admit when you are the problem as well, and your issues are deeper than psychological, but are spiritual. A life that lacks God, lacks truth.

. So while you post your memes and sayings, about everyone else being the toxic entity that is negatively affecting your "woke" energy.........consider the need for your own spiritual detox from your own toxicity. Understand the black plagues within your own bloodline, and how it has affected you today. Take into consideration, that the rebellious choices that you make a part from God, is actually considered witchcraft, which means, you, we, I, have brought a heap of iniquity to the table. Everything that a person does in agreement with generational familiar spirits, makes them toxic.

Acts 2:40

"40 And with many other words did he testify and exhort, saying, Save yourselves from this untoward generation.