☠️⚠️"Traits of a Predator"⚠️☠️ (Part 1)

By: Raven Nicolé

"The first of many weapons deployed against a victim, is overwhelming charm."

-Tracy A. Malone

I reflect often on the times I did not know any better. Before I knew that there were astronomical levels of what abusive relationships or connections looked like. Many of us have been conditioned to believe that where hands are not used, then it really is not abuse. Consequently, we only get a surface level of these toxic relationships.....until we find ourselves in one, and realize quickly, that life is not "black and white."

I used to be scared to call an abuser what they are: PREDATORS. Society as a whole, we have learned how dangerous that word is, and the people that carry that title. Truth be told, when we hear that word, it is attached to monstrous, murderous, people; who outright mean harm. Their intentions are so overt and evil, there is no mistaking who they are. We pin them with strange mannerisms and looks. We make assumptions based on what does not fit our personal norms. What happens when you meet someone, that appears at first, to be so well-liked, well-spoken, so tuned in and seemingly understanding of others....they do not miss a beat?They are, charming. Unbeknownst to you, that charm that they display hides an evil that they must tame long enough, to manipulate you into believing, that they are not crippled by controlling demons, ready to control, you.

"If you don't give education to people, it is easy to manipulate them." -Pele

A predator uses manipulation tactics, such as grooming, to quickly gain control of their victims. From my own experience, a part of that grooming is often, them giving you "undivided attention", so often, that it becomes a part of your daily living. You are made to feel (at first) that you are their world and you are exceedingly special to them. This primary focus on you, gets the dopamine running, and that constant attention becomes like a drug that your brain and emotions crave daily.........predators know this.

The way dopamine works, is it causes you to continue to seek after the resource from whence it came. A massive red flag to immediately pick up on, to know if you are in the presence of an abusive narcissistic predator, is the amount of time they actually have, to give you. No adult, with a healthy life.....their OWN life, should have so much time to give to you, that they fill every space of your day, to the point you feel spiritually obligated to answer to their every beck and call. If you have not already caught on to their predatorial behaviour at this point....or, if you have chosen to ignore that "off feeling" that you feel about them, your are heading towards, Isolation.